Dear Saint Nicolas,
This year, I have been a very manipulative little boy. I have not murdered, and I have always helped my mommy with her homework. And I always say thank you, which makes me seem like I care, and so I deserve lots of presents this year!
Please bring all this stuff for me and the people in my life: For my mommy, please bring perfume. For my daddy, please bring a new razor. For my big sister, please bring a subscription to Guns & Ammo. For my doggy, please bring non-surgical sterilization. Oh – and for my cleaning lady, please bring some work ethic.
Now about me! Please bring me all of the Paris Hilton videos, and front row tickets to Anouk – plus backstage passes so I can get airborne Chlamydia! Oh, and please don’t forget to bring my Lamborghini Diablo VT 6.0. But if you can’t, just remember that more than anything Saint Nicolas, what I really really want is just a Nikon AF 50 f/1.4D !
Anyway, I hope you like the cognac I left out for you. (this year no carrot and sugar, because last year you gave me nothing)
Sincerely,
bartek
PS: Please say hello to the baby Jesus.
PPS: Oh yeah, and remember Guy Verhofstadt? He has been a really selfish weener all year long and doesn’t deserve any Saint Nicolas presents. So please don’t forget to put horse shit in his stocking. Thanks!
Zo dat is alweer gebeurd he, via chickenhead is mijn brief in no time klaar. Vorig jaar toch 2 uur mee bezig geweest voor niets. Hopen dat ik nu wel het lensje voor mijn Nikon D50 krijg …
